Table Of Interest
- 1 How You Can Help Your Child Not To Be Marginalized At School
- 1.1 How You Can Help Your Child Not To Be Marginalized At School
- 1.2 What to do in such cases?
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How You Can Help Your Child Not To Be Marginalized At School
¡I do not want to go to school! There are all the bad guys! They do not love me! “Declares the child”. Tears flow like water, neither arguments nor persuasions help.
What to do in such cases?
In the game, the child masters communication skills, understands the world around him, understands his abilities and receives an evaluation of the actions taken by him from the first year.
Usually, in elementary school, the child does not have enough communication with parents and relatives, he has friends, now he needs to earn the respect and recognition of his classmates. At this time, the child begins to develop self-esteem and, in many ways, depends on how others perceive it.
It happens that relationships with classmates categorically do not add up. In the best of cases, the marginalized simply does not allow common games and conversations, in the worst case, he is satisfied with a true persecution.
Many children face, if not harassment, at least, the rejection of their classmates, and, unfortunately, these children do not always find the understanding of their own parents. “It’s okay, everything happens,” say the elders.
Meanwhile, the inability to find a common language with others and make friends with them is a serious problem. Of a child that the children’s team does not accept, a teenager often grows up, is not suited to communicate with the real world and lives in a virtual space.
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A child can not do without his peers, but their communication with them without the help of adults often does not succeed. Often, it is necessary to intervene directly in relationships with other children: the child should be taught how to get out of a conflict situation, how to endure, distinguish the permissible and unacceptable effects of an aggressive partner.
Sometimes children hide their problems from their elders, since it is shameful and unpleasant for them to talk about it, they do not want to disturb the adults and they do not understand that they can help them.
There are a series of signs by which you can judge that the child has problems on the computer:
● the child reluctantly goes to school and makes up any excuse to miss school;
● comes back from school upset;
● speaks little and reluctantly about school life;
● often cries for no apparent reason;
● does not talk about his friends;
● does not talk to them on the phone;
● the child is never invited to birthdays and other parties;
● Does not want to invite anyone to visit him.
If most of these signs are present, the child has problems with his peers. Do not think that you do not need to communicate, you just do not know how to start a friendship, and it is the adults who should help you in this.
To begin with, it is necessary to speak frankly with the child, listen carefully and try to make sure that your story is as accurate as possible. It is important to help your son or daughter understand the very concept of “friendship” and explain its essence.
It is necessary to show the value of a relationship of this kind, backed up with examples from their own lives. We should try to warn the child against mistakes, to explain that friendship can not be bought, begged, exchanged for something.
You should ask the child who you would like to be friends with and with whom and why, in your opinion, you can be a good friend, and ask what he personally does to be friends with him. It often turns out that the child himself takes the position of “victim”, that he has no friends, because he does not know how to clarify the people who need them.
The reaction of the marginalized to what is happening is also important. One begins to cry immediately, the second to fight, the third one is going to complain and the fourth one in general pretends that nothing happened. This style of behavior, which parents and teachers often advise, is incorrect.
If all the time he pretends that nothing happens, that the persecution is quite normal, the situation will not change. How to behave in such cases depends on the situation and the identity of the offenders and the offender.
Nowadays, in schools, especially in prestigious schools, the problem of rich and poor students is getting worse.
Children look at who has what phones, who is dressed and how much money they give to spend. If the child himself is worried about his modest attire, he will definitely be teased. If a teenager does not pay attention to him or says that “asceticism in clothes is his style,” he will not be harassed with bullying. The main defense here is trust.
Help your child maintain friendships.
Let your house always be open to your friends, let them go visit them. On your child’s birthday, invite not only adult family members, but also friends. And let the child decide who to invite. In this way, you will have the opportunity to observe the behavior of the child’s friends and understand what impact they have on him.
In no case, do not protect the child from communication with their peers for fear of being rejected or offended. Help him find his social circle, write in a circle or section, even if at the beginning he has one or two friends there, but they will be united by common interests.
Organize a joint pastime of the child with classmates: going to the movies, to football, to picnics. Of course, it will take effort, but the result is worth it. Talk to the teachers, ask how the child communicates in class and with whom.
If the situation, despite all efforts, does not change, you should contact a psychologist.
Or maybe the problem is us, the parents? It is impossible to guide a child by managing my whole life and not letting him go alone. Of course, friendly relations between children and parents are praiseworthy, but it is with friends and not with parents that the child communicates on equal terms, and they trust their little secrets.
Parental support is necessary for any child, but especially for such children.
That’s the much we can take on the topic “How You Can Help Your Child Not To Be Marginalized At School”.
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